My poor yard

Drainage projects abound at my home. We're rerouting downspouts and gravity drains. Sigh. That's John in the hat supervising.

Formula 3 made my tootsies all lovely again

It's been four weeks of painting my toenails twice daily with the Formula 3 oil-based tolnafol anti fungal medication my dermatologist gave me to try (I have to go back this week to report on my findings). I'd have to say I give this one an A+. You can only get this from a doctor so don't try to order it online (the company's website says products sold under it's name on line are bogus counterfeits). I read the bottle costs $45 but I got mine for free. I am having to pay for the return trip to the dermatologist for a check.

My sweet toes have never looked better, and by better I mean I am not planning on becoming a foot model and giving up my day job, but it's nice to wear open toed shoes and not have people wondering if those are nails or hooves on my feet.

They were gross. Really.

And since I'm a market research by nature I decided to document my results, for a little empircal show and tell if you will.

Here is the before (brace yourself):

And here is the after (awww!). Now they aren't done yet as toe nails take 1 year sometimes to completely regrow. But I see a difference. Really, I do.

Little half moon thingy at the base of my nail that I haven't seen in 25 years: Welcome Back!

Bill's party rocked...literally

I don't know what Bill was serving in his mystery alcoholic drinks cause I was too doped up on pain meds by the time we arrived, but I ended up passing a kidney stone while there and Eileen was taken off to the hospital for gall stones not 48 hours later.

Coincidence or conspiracy? You decide.

Hey Bill, was it vodka or lighter fluid you used in those mixed drinks? I may not make it to the party next year at this rate, or was that all part of your evil plan?

Seriously though---passing a kidney stone is not pleasant, and the little meteoroid that inhabited my inner space made its move about 15 minutes before we were set to leave for Bill's. You know how in space, no one can hear you scream? Well in your bathroom, the entire house can hear mommy giving birth (practically). This did not seem to dissuade the kids or the husband from knocking on the bathroom door to ask me if we were ready to go yet! I think my little hunk of moon rock must have turned a corner from my ureter in my big ol' black hole of a bladder because I felt fine a few minutes later, and two capsules of something narcotic I had (on prescription, thank you) did the trick. Lo and behold, two hours later there it was, a little piece of calcium agony. And just like that I was cured.

It's a miracle!

Just like Riley's birth of the namesake Life of Riley party at Bill's.

Hope you feel better Eileen. Next year we need T-Shirts. Life of Riley ROCKS!

The kidney stone is out!

Hallelujah!

How one teeny, tiny little stone could cause me pain like giving birth on Sunday is beyond me, but I am thrilled beyond belief to be done with that!

I'm feeling like an oyster

I finally got a diagnosis today after a return trip to the doctor. I spent the entire evening wide awake and nauseous. He sent me for a CT scan after I mentioned it felt like something trying to get out of me (that's the way I can only visualize the pain, as if something was stuck).

Stuck it is. I have three kidney stones. One from 2003 in my left kidney is now lodged in a little spot by my bladder. It's only 3mm in size but let me tell you if you had a grain of sand wedged in your wee wee you would notice it.

Well, at least it's not cancer!

The doctor gave me Flowmax (yeah, my husband remarked now I can go fishing all day with the guys like in the commercial). It's commonly used to treat enlarged prostates in men (it relaxes the ureter so the stone can pass. I have to take it daily and drink THREE LITRES of liquids per day. I'm queasy just thinking about that. Oh, and I get to strain my urine as well to look for this little pearl. My husband offered up the gold mesh coffee filter to which I said EW and NO thanks!  I don't care how many times you run it through the dishwasher....

I learned in all this that I do not tolerate sulfur drugs as I experienced every miserable side effect it offered, including "anorexia" (I have had no desire to eat for days), "nausea," "dizziness," "stomach upset," and "diarrhea."

Yeah. It's great being me.

Oh, and guess what can cause kidney stones? TEA. I guess 4 cups a day for 20 years has finally taken its toll. As Bill would say, time to switch to beer.

It hasn't been a great week here

I'll be very glad when we're all on the mend.

Monday. I had my mole removed and by Monday evening was being treated for a UTI. William came down with a fever and sore throat.

Tuesday. I wake up with a fever and no relief from my UTI. My doctor changes me to a different antibiotic. William still sick.

Wednesday. Urine culture comes back negative (WHAT?) and doctor says go to see my Gyne for a pelvic exam. Feel miserable. Go see gyne (they squeezed me in) and she says she can't see anything wrong. Tells me to continue the antibiotics anyway. Takes a million swabs and another urine culture. William still sick.

Wednesday night. Learn that when they say to not take medicine on an empty stomach they MEAN it. Spend about an hour in the bathroom wanting to die.

Thursday. William still sick. Mommy feeling somewhat more human but not 100%. Cancel den meeting I'm hosting tonight (so much for my plans).

My toes are doing fine thank you. Want some pizza?

I've been religiously painting my little piggies twice per day and I can see an improvement. The problem is I'm not sure if it the anti-fungal medication or the fact that my toenails are being bathed in sweet almond and rice oil twice per day. They never seemed so, so moisturized???

Perhaps I will wax poetically upon my tender tootsies while dining on some nearly free pizza from Jewel. I zipped over and grabbed some 14 boxes for $1.93 each (regularly $6 each) and stuffed my freezer full. It's part of the buy some Coke get some pizza for next to nothing (but it turns out you don't need to buy the Coke after all) deal. Since I know most (if not all---except for you Rose and Bill) don't even HAVE a Jewel near you, I'll spare you the details on my pepperoni and 5 cheese and garlic chicken extravaganza.

At this point I feel the urge to tell you I am 5'7" and weigh 128 pounds.

I will not be eating all 14 boxes THIS WEEK.

Thank you!!